Stepmother of the bride shows off white dress she plans to wear to stepdaughter's wedding: 'It isn't white…it’s tan…almost goldish'

Author image for JR Atkinson
JR Atkinson • Writer and Editor
Aug 11, 2025 10:00 PM EDT

What is with people and wearing white to other people's weddings? Isn't it a universally acknowledged truth that you shouldn't do that? Unless you're literally a child, you cannot plead ignorance on this one (and in that case, an adult should have told you). Even if the bride in question isn't wearing white, unless she specifically told everyone that they could wear the color, you shouldn't. You never know what others will say about you and what kind of dispersions will be cast upon you. But I have a feeling that a lack of respect for propriety isn't what is stopping these folks who wear white. I have a feeling that they crave the attention. These are the people who have a hard time seeing someone else in the spotlight, and they will do anything it takes to steal it from them. These people exist; you just hope they don't exist at your wedding. 

But narcissists are unfortunately sometimes invited to weddings. Sometimes they're part of families that have no choice but to let them attend their big celebration. You just hope that they can rein it in.

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  • That wasn't the case at this wedding. In a bitter, bitter place on the internet called r/weddingattireapproval, a whole discourse went down. The brave Redditors who took these cases upon themselves went to war on behalf of this bride. And she was left wondering what to do about this dress situation. Read on to see what happened. 

  • Dress that stepmother of the bride is proposing to wear to the wedding...

    An older woman wears a cream-colored shimmery dress.
    via u/picklesbutternut
  • In the father of the bride's words, "it isnt white...it's tan...almost goldish"
    via u/picklesbutternut

  • Commenters brought their wrath.

    • Ok_Resource_8530 15h ago Tell the father of the bride that the entire wedding congregation will be laughing at his wife for attempting to upstage his daughter. Does he really want people to be laughing at her behind her back? Not to mention all the snide comments. He doesn't think much of his wife does he.
    via u/Ok_Resource_8530
  • Egyptian-Passion1604 16h ago . If that wasn't white, it would be quite the dress. She's obviously a stunner, but it's not her day. She can capture the crowd another time.
    via u/Egyptian-Passion1604
  • • HappySummerBreeze 15h ago That's a white dress. Even if the father of the bride genuinely believes it's not white (it is), he will still be embarrassed by everyone at the wedding talking about how shameful his wife is and how as a father he is for permitting his date to wear white.
    via u/HappySummerBreeze
  • It will be years before people forget, he will be known to all the guests as that guy who let his date come to his own daughter's wedding wearing a white dress. She looks lovely and can wear it for another occasion. One that won't ostracise herself and the father of the bride.
    via u/HappySummerBreeze
  • Traumagatchi • 16h ago I hope there are pockets to put all her audacity
    via u/Traumagatchi
  • SYadon Mom • 17h ago It's a nice dress on her, she could use it for a special occasion with her own husband but for your stepdaughter's wedding......no. It's too whiteish. If she wants tan/gold get an actual tan/gold dress. Why, why, why do woman do this to each other?!
    via u/SYadonMom
  • A bride places a corsage on an older woman's wrist at a wedding.
    via Hermes Rivera

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • IWasGoatbeardFirst 16h ago . How embarrassing for her.
    via u/IWasGoatbeardFirst
  • Ghost_Puppy · 15h ago . It's not White iT's ChAmPaGnE!1!!1! It's too close to white, DOLORES.
    via u/Ghost_Puppy
  • icedcoffeemachine 15h ago • I know it's a stereotype, but... it just had to be the stepmother. Why are so many of them like this?
    via u/icedcoffeemachine
  • • HappyWithMyDogs 16h ago As a stepmom I would run whatever dress I was choosing by my stepdaughter. And it most certainly would NOT look like that.
    via u/HappyWithMyDogs
  • LunaMoon20 • 15h ago . It's actually embarrassing for her that she would think this is an appropriate choice.
    via u/LunaMoon20
  • MasterpieceActual176 17h ago • I understand that she likes the fit. But it is too light. If she wears it she will make a fool of herself.
    via u/MasterpieceActual176
  • Individual_Ad_8860 • 15h ago Do women not realize that wearing white to wedding makes them objects of derision.
    via u/Individual_Ad_8860
  • • atinyl... 16h ago Edited 16h ago • If she won't change the dress when asked, then the only thing that works with these kinds of people is shame. Tease her for trying to marry her son-in-law, warn that people will gossip about her, even call her incestuous.
    via u/atinylittlebug
  • Terrible-Radish-6866 • 15h ago Am I the only one who is pretty sure they grew up with lampshades just like that? Nightgown, maybe, but one of those meant to be seen, not slept in.
    via u/Terrible-Radish-6866
  • I know it is whitish, and that's not recommended unless the engaged couple propose the idea, but the creases (or pleats, or whatever you want to call them) caught my attention first. Perhaps the couple could mention the dress's resemblance to great aunt Gertie's living room lamps after 5 or 10 years of nicotine residue deposits? That might make her rethink the idea.
    via u/Terrible-Radish-6866
  • yamfries2024 • 16h ago I'm usually on the side of "moms have been wearing champagne, beige etc for decades" but this is too white. I'm also not a bride who would confront many people over their attire, but I would tell her that I wanted to e the only one wearing white at my wedding, and I would deeply appreciate it if she could find something else. If she refuses, just let it go. She will get the side eye from enough other people at your wedding.
    via u/yamfries2024
  • Maleficent-Spray1613 16h ago My friend's mom wore a deeper shade of champagne (it was shimmery fabric) which was beautiful, but this is definitely a no being too light. Don't get me started on the cleavage. Mamas can still be and not steal attention. How frustrating this even has to be addressed!
    via u/Maleficent-Spray1613
  • ACynical Optomist 15h ago • "But it photographs white, so you're going to have to pick a different color."
    via u/ACynicalOptomist
  • Financial-Rock-3790 16h ago . Tell the father he won't be the one walking her down the aisle if the stepmother wears this dress or another also suspiciously white adjacent. And if he's fine not walking her down the aisle ... then they will both be staying at home, and they can save the dress for their own vow renewal.
    via u/Financial-Rock-3790
  • gadgal 17h ago Sorry, but hard no. It is too close to white especially in this style of dress-absolutely could be a more casual-leaning wedding dress!!!
    via u/gadgal
  • Method Maven • 13h ago Obviously, dad chose a trophy wife for step mom - probably 2x years his junior. And, she definitely has main character energy. I hope someone dissuade her from wearing it to a wedding - unless it is her next one.
    via u/MethodMaven
  • cappotto-marrone • 15h ago Usually I'm a 'That's not too white' person. BUT, this is white and could conceivably be a wedding dress.
    via u/cappotto-marrone
  • AriesProductions 15h ago • Have you asked her why she wants to wear a cheap Marilyn Monroe subway grate dress costume to your wedding? And that's white. It's not even off white, candlelight or cream lol
    via u/AriesProductions

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